I woke up very early that day, it was 4 am, and i couldn't sleep. I bet the poisons were working hard in hurting me. So, instead of lying on bed thinking of bad things, i got out and watched movies,they are able to calm me.Then i went out of the apartment to see the sunrise among the buildings, in this city of Singapore.The rays of light promise me hopes and i was really happy.I got my strength back and able to continue walking down the path. And now, i still haven't completely healed.The questions are still popping out in my head.I need answers to stop them,to heal completely.
It really feels so bad, when all the trust i have given in,and been proved that i was wrong. Am i important? I have no idea. Probably the whole world now will start to say how stupid am i, how ignorant am i, how useless am i... because i fall too deep, i give too much and people start to take it for granted.I don't hope for any good repay, but why give me nightmares? I guess i can't really blame anyone else but me myself,cause i was too serious, i was too demanding.Still, deep inside my heart, i really want to cry out,and to have someone's hand to wipe the tears off ,to understand how my heart feels ,hold me tightly and to let me hold tightly.
After this, i believe i have learnt lots about the real truth and facts.About ego, love, attitude, personality and etc. But nevermind, as i have mentioned before, i keep my hopes,my dreams and my faith. It's what counts mostly, it's what really matters. And i really feel happy now, though it hasn't completely healed, but after writing down everything, i feel like i have flushed all the emotions out.It's a relief and i don't really care if nobody read them,cause after all, my emotions will not affect the weather here. I guess now i really love writing...
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